26th January

Today is Australia Day! A day to celebrate what we are as a country and I think that the common consensus around my house is that our country is an economic mess. I guess that this is what we get when we have had to rely on the American economy & then we get screwed when they write NINJA loans...

But anyway enough of being bitter. The plus side is that we still have jobs and businesses to go to when so many more will not. Retail will use this as an excuse to sack under performing staff as will most sectors of business. Mining will suffer and that means that the Hunter Valley will suffer..Very glass half empty.

We have been away for a few days and some really positive things have come of that. We got to see a few family and friends that we have not seen for some time which was great and we also got to celebrate with Kelly & Josh as they got married. My Kelly looked so stunning.

2 more sleeps and Samantha is starting Kindergarten. I can not believe that she is almost 5 years old. It only seems like yesterday that she was born and now we are getting her ready for school. There will be tears when we take her to school on Wednesday.

Considering we have been travelling i think I did OK with TF. I don't think that I would have lost any weight but probably not gained either. Will go for a weigh in on Wednesday to see how things have gone!.

Oh and we got approval for the purchase of our house about half an hour before we walked out the door on Wednesday last week!!! The Morgan family is on the move again..

16th January

What should I do today? I have been off work for just under 4 weeks now and I am starting to go batty. You can only read so many books and watch so many movies.

We are trying so hard to save money with the purchase of "our house". So what we are allowing ourselves to do very little. The boys are going to have a game of golf and I think that Sam & I might go to lollipop play land so that she can get rid of some excess energy plus we need to get some grocery shopping done as we are going through lots and lots of salad stuff at the moment.

Nothing all that exciting planned for today at all.

The day turned out to be just that, another day!! But I ate well and did not cheat on TF and all is well that ends well.

Going to watch Pineapple Express now to get a few laughs in before the day is over

15th January

This afternoon, because it was such a hot day we decided to take the kids to the beach for a while. I have always been a massive fan of the water, but today was different. I think that every person on that beach was watching my every move, like I was some kind of beached whale.

I am sure that I am wrong but I guess for the first time I was aware of ME!

I have never been one to care what other people think of me as far as my size goes. I have always figured that they either accept it or go to hell. I dress appropriately for my size, I don't go showing off bits that should remain covered. Why was today different?

Maybe it was because Paul was over in the rock pools taking photos and not there by my side as my protector, or maybe it was just that because I am trying to do something about this that I am more aware of the perception of fat girls.

Regardless of that, I had my first weigh in this morning and I was astounded that I had not put all the weight back on that I started with 12 months ago.

Still a little bit edgy about blogging my actual weight but I figure that one day that I will only be embarrassed that I allowed myself to be this size and that I never did anything about it before and not necessarily about the numbers.

Can I get it under control and what will I look like a couple of dress sizes small... I don't know. I have been this size for the last 9 years at the very least. I did drop 1 dress size for a few months last year but old habits kicked into play and I was back where I started in no time.

This time is different. I have a new found confidence and want to do this so that my family is proud of me and so that they are also healthy and happy.

Until next time

13th January

Today I started the Tony Ferguson weight loss program. I decided to do this for many reason. Some of them are selfish reason and some are health reasons & some are to keep my family happy & healthy.

Paul & I have often spoke about me losing weight but the more he pushes me the more weight I seem to put on. I made a decision this morning that this has to be about me and not what others want from me.

I have tried Tony Ferguson before but stopped after about a week because it made me sick. But this time I have to get through that because it just might be a life saver!!

I am starting this journey at a weight that I am not yet willing to disclose (still a bit sensitive with that) but I will keep you up to date with the progress as it comes to light.

Anyhow I guess that is it for today....

Have a good one.